


The easiest pieces to lose

by cityofconstellations



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Implied/Referenced Suicide, Multi, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-22
Updated: 2019-10-22
Packaged: 2020-12-28 16:02:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21139364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cityofconstellations/pseuds/cityofconstellations
Summary: Trigger warningImplied/Referenced suicide scene





	The easiest pieces to lose

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger warning   
Implied/Referenced suicide scene

"We made an oath" 

There was something about those words that chilled Stanley Uris to the very bone. Something inexplicable, like the pull of a long forgotten memory floating just beyond his immediate reach. A crushing wave of dread washed over him, threatening to drown him, as fragments of long lost memories wove themselves back together in his mind. 

It's the good stuff that leaves you first. It's the brightest pictures in our minds that fade away the fastest. It's those pieces of you that feel the easiest to lose .

A flash of fiery red hair glittering in the sun. The sharp sting of glass slicing open the delicate skin of his palm. And most poignantly, the pair of eyes shining so impossibly blue, gazing unrelentingly into his own, freezing him in place, so intense and yet uncertain. 

But with this nostalgia came a vile, rotting presence, darkening his mind and creeping insidiously along the precipitous edges of his memories, forcing him to remember. 

He remembered that summer, 27 years ago, a summer so terrifying it had been locked up in the furthest recess of his mind, untouched until this moment. 

He felt his phone leave his hand, Mike Hanlon long forgotten, and with his mind working on autopilot, he made his way resignedly to the upstairs bedroom. Sitting on the bed, the springs creaking in protest, he put his head in his hands, his mind numb. 

He was a logical person, always had been, ever since he was a child, and this trait had obstinately followed him into adulthood, into his steady marriage with Patricia and successful job as an accountant. He liked numbers. Numbers didn't lie or play tricks with his mind. He knew how to view the world like a chessboard and life as a game of chess, full of strategies, decisions and wrong moves. Even now his mind had already weighed up all the variables and decided the best course of action.

The only course of action. 

He had to take himself off the board. 

For his friends. 

For the losers. 

Lying in the porcelain bath, his life slowly trickled away and he thought of the brave boy he once knew back in Derry, the boy who was forced to grow up too fast after the death of his younger brother. 

He thought of the boy he realised he loved that summer, who he never truly forgot. Not really. He had always wondered why his heart always stung, it skipped a beat when someone stuttered. Why it begged him to remember another pair of eyes when Patricia looked at him with such profound love in hers. 

With his dying breath, he poured every last ounce of regret, every last ounce of love and sorrow into three final words. 

"I swear, Bill". 

Maybe it was too little, too late, but the words seemed to set him free. It was as if a weight he didn't even know he had been carrying for 27 years, had finally been lifted. 

Because in order to win a game of chess, you have to sacrifice some of your best pieces.


End file.
